In Case You Were Wondering

Just in case anyone was curious (I know nobody noticed) about my temporary absenceseses……

I MOVED!!!!!!! 

Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen (and males and females of the less polite variety) I am no longer living in my parents house!

Josh and I woke up at the ass-crack of pre-dawn saturday(I didn’t even know there was an A.M. on saturdays?!) and didn’t stop packing, cleaning, moving, and organizing until he left for work (out of town againnnn) yesterday. And after he left I was still doing approximately fifty bajillion loads of laundry, and setting up a huge shelf thingy and figuring out where the fuck to put our newly washed clothes.

What does all of this mean in the long run though? That I’ve barely started on my aforementioned mountain of library books. Which means that I will inevitably incur another monstrous library fine….. *shakes my head at my own lack of dedication to geekdom* But yes…

This also means:

My vote for dinner now counts for 50% of the decision, unless Josh is gone and then it’s 100% (but it will only ever be easy mac because I’m about as good at cooking as I am at speaking french, meaning I can burn water, and I sometimes figure out how to use a microwave right.)

Smidgey has her own room. (meaning that her crib isn’t staring at us with a look of shame when we participate in delightfully fun adult activities.)

I don’t have to deal with my brothers dumb-ass dog jumping everywhere (he’s a fucking pit mix, so he’s huge.) near my babies head.

I don’t have to deal with my mother’s passive aggressive jibes at my hair, clothes, parenting skills, attitude, music taste, and her almost always making pork products when Josh is home. (I don’t really understand everything that comes along with the whole Messianic Jew thing, But even I know that cooking everyone BLT’s for dinner and saying “Oops I forgot, you can have breadsticks” is rude.)

IIIII get to pick the smells of candles, dish soap, air-fresheners , drier sheets, everything. I know it seems kindof petty but I am soooo tired of pumpkin, waffles, and maple-syrup candles. Why does the entire house have to smell like a fucking sugar overdose all the time?

No more obnoxiously stupid questions about what I think of her brand new (hideous) orange (my least-favorite color) rug/curtains/dish towels.

The last and probably best thing I’ve been enjoying so far though, No more cold showers. Oh my gosh. We had seven people fighting for hot water constantly. It was impossible to get a hot shower longer than ten minutes (and I only take 15 minute showers!!!!) because my dad, my mom, and my sister all require a three hour soak in a scalding hot tub every damn day. Now I only have to share with Josh, who takes barely luke-warm showers three hours before I get up. This is amazing people.

The only thing that really sucks is that with all of the deposits/first months rent/groceries we spent about $2,000 in the course of two days. And I’m still trying to get the last of our stuff organized.

Smidge (thank god) is also sleeping better in her own room, because Josh and I aren’t constantly wandering in and out and talking, and my siblings aren’t stomping through the hall right beside her head.

So yes, I am happy. But fuck ’cause now I have to update my bio thingy, catch up on blog reading, and book reading, and start looking for a new church because even though I have a hard time being around those people, I feel better when I go. A lot better. (Yea, I know, I make jokes about satan, swear every other word, and listen to songs about how religion is brainwash, but I do believe in God, I just also believe in not being an asshole, plusss Jesus hung out with whores, not pretty perfect suburbanites. )

3 thoughts on “In Case You Were Wondering”

  1. congratulations on moving, and hot water, and no more questions about orange-colored things, and fresh air. 😃. it’s always tough right after the move but as you’ve already found out, well worth it. just remember to breathe!! 😃

    Liked by 1 person

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